Working Mom Woes

Before this massive life changing gut punch, I was a very hard-working mom who worked outside the home.  Many people didn't know then, but most know now, that Chris left his job several years ago in order to focus more time on the kids while I pursued my career goals.  Back in 2011, this was pretty ground breaking, but more and more dads are becoming the "at home" parent these days.  It was fantastic for us - I traveled quite a bit, and the kids were able to maintain after school activities that they would not have otherwise been able to do.

In addition to the grief, sadness, and pain, we are also learning to adjust to me being the sole parent.  This has been one of the hardest adjustments.  For the first time in my life, I have to plan my schedule around school holidays, find before and after school care (thank you again to my wonderful family), as well as do homework, pack lunches, etc.  My typical day is this:  wake up at 4:45, shower and get dressed, pack lunches, wake kids at 5:45, leave home by 6:15, arrive at work by 7:15, get off work at 5:15, home at 6:30, dinner, homework, showers, family time, and in bed by 9:00 for the kids.  The sliver of time between 9:00-10:00 is the precious amount of time that I have for exercise (I wish), meditation, or active grieving.  These are on days that I'm lucky enough to get the kids to bed and sleeping at a decent hour.  Add in two days per week for a 2-hour football practice, and it's easy to see why I'm always completely exhausted.

My work family has been incredibly accommodating and I've managed to avoid travel for work up until this point.  However, that all ends later in September with two consecutive weeks of overnight travel that will take me to Atlanta and Wisconsin.

I've really been dreading the first overnight trip.  My last trip was just days before Chris passed away, and I've been obsessing a bit over the "what ifs".  However, I think WE are ready.  The kids need to see that some things in life have to get back to normal, and one of our normals is that mom is a full time marketing professional who has drive, ambition, and is pretty successful in that aspect of her life.

I am thankful for Skype and living near family.  And while I feel sure the kids will be OK without me for a few nights, we will still take any prayers you want to send our way to make this next adjustment a smooth one!