I still remember the five stages of grief from my high school psychology class. What I didn't learn in class is that those stages are fluid, and some of them fit you like a warm blanket. My stage of choice these days is anger.
I get irrationally rage-y against people who are innocuous in their selfishness. Rational Amy knows that their words and actions are not meant to directly hurt me, and that humans are just innately selfish, but I still spit virtual venom at these harmless acquaintances daily.
My favorites are the "well, I have no idea what you're going through, but I have been through a nasty divorce" people. I get at least one of these well meaning but misplaced ass hats weekly. To these people, I say: Please don't try to find our common ground. I was in a happy marriage and my husband died in my arms. I'm sorry your husband/wife/partner was a cheater or lazy, but we are not even close to being in the same atmosphere.
These days I also have a very low tolerance for your first world problems. Stressed out about moving? Yeah, no. Stressed out about your job? Poor thing. I have weathered levels of stress that would destroy many people. I wish others could experience just one day of real world problems, and they'd realize how completely ridiculous 90% of our daily complaints really are.
To those who have experienced the new, bitingly frank Amy, I would like to apologize, but I'm actually quite liberated by my new perspective.
Yes.
ReplyDeleteHa. No one knows what you're going through; not even the people who have actually experienced something similar. Tragedy and grief are individual. And there's nothing wrong with calling it like you see it, nor with feeling stabby. I wish you didn't have a big bucket of suck on your lap though.
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